I was on my way back home and had been mentally preparing to go to my next show in Grand Junction, CO after having survived the long week in Oklahoma City at the end of April. My wife informed me over the phone that her father had taken a turn for the worse.
Let me back up a bit. Five years ago my wife had resigned her position as an administrative assistant in the police department, after much decision making anguish, to return to New Mexico to take care of her mother whose Alzheimer's had progressed to the point where her father could not take care of her very effectively. Five months later, after she passed on, it became apparent that her father was unable to live independently. He had a form of Parkinson's and associated dementia. Now it was time to take care of him.
He had been in a group assisted living arrangement for the last four months as taking care of him on her own had become more than she could manage and, as she was the sole caregiver, she needed a break. This was to be a short term respite for her, and maybe for him too! Even while he was in the group home she would visit once or twice daily. It was during the second visit that particular day she noticed he was considerably different than in the morning, slumped over and unresponsive. The house staff only thought he was napping! (That's a whole 'nother story) turns out he had become seriously dehydrated, had a UTI and probably was on deaths door at that point. Some significant intravenous fluids and broad band antibiotics at the hospital brought him back sorta. She was planning on bringing him home anyway but this incident forced the issue. He came home and was able to make his passage in his own home on his terms.
So what's all this rambling about? Well, sometimes you make plans and things go along smoothly and other times your plans are short circuited or need to change, I'm sure we've all been there for one reason or another. I won't pretend that I always do the right thing and that it was a no brainer on my part to decide to bail on the Grand Junction show. After all, the time of his departure from this world, let alone anyone else, isn't printed on the bottom of your foot. I had all the work ready to go. I drove down to NM in the "art van" in case things weren't too serious (a three hundred mile "detour" in a southerly direction). The hotel was booked and all the fees were paid. At the very least I already had to pay for 1 nights lodging, as I didn't read the fine print on the cancellation policy, as-well-as the booth fee! After some serious soul searching I decided to forego the show. I had been there for the last five years why wouldn't I be there at the very end? Time will take care of the rest.
