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Well, I saw Connie's gentle goading while I was goading Barry Bernstein.

I will man up with a full report.

I find it amazing that between over 700 artists who did the Grove, St. Stephen's and Artigras--there has been blicko.

I was patiently waiting.  You know if I have done the show I am going to report.  I was just waiting to hopefully see other input.

So here goes.

GETTING THERE.

It is now a rite of passage for me to travel to Artigras.  I have done the show most years since 1991.

For me, it is a straight shot east out of Ybor on Route 60 to Yeehaw Junction.  About one hour and a half.  Then, another hour and a half down to Jupiter just north of the show site in Abacoa.

Along the way on Route 60 you get to travel thru old Florida towns like Valrico, Mulberry, Bartow, Bealsville and Lake Wales.

This is Phosphate country so you see what accounts for tall hills for us Crackers, big mounds of Phosphate.  Near Lake Wales you are overtaken by the sickeningly sweet smell of citrus in the air.  That's all the oranges getting pulped up into juice at the factories.

Back in Valrico, you are near Plant City, that means strawberries.

You will see the stands selling shakes, flats and jams.  You will witness hundreds of pickers in the fields gathering the ripening berry.

Guess what? A lot of them have learned from us.  You will see white KD canopies everywhere offering a little shade.

The epitome of my trip is when I go by Ruby's fruit and veggie stand in Bealsville.

Ruby has her hand-painted, almost Grandma Moses signs everywhere, advertising her stock.  Ruby now exhibits at Gasparilla and the Disney show--how do you like that.  She is almost as famous as Clyde Butcher who is our Florida version of Ansel Adams, he does it in the Everglades mainly.

Sometimes if I have time I hit the Crazy Fish restaurant in Lake Wales.  Yummy, good, down-home vittles--at down-home prices--try them sometime.

At Yeehaw, you go by the old restaurant-bar with the great hand-painted sign that says "Jackass Crossing."  The signs have been saying new biz coming--for about two years now.

Then I am on the turnpike, love my Sunpass, no stopping no grabbing a ticket, just whiz on by.

When I go over the high bridge that says "Thomas B. Manuel"  I know I am now officially in southeast Florida.  I always try to speed up to see if I can get the van airborne on it.  Never happens--too much art--too much hopeful expectations of coming sales.

Down aways, I see the Jupiter exit and wind east.

I always think of Burt and Lonnie when I come to Jupiter.  Burt being--Mr. Reynolds, Lonnie being, Mrs. Anderson.

In the old days of Artigras they would always make an appearance on opening day-arm in arm like visiting royalty.  Burt always threw out frivolous one-liners, Lonnie just exuded being Lonnie.  We loved it.

In the old days, Jimmy Dean used to show up and buy art for his yacht.

I know this, because once this guy shows up in my booth, laden in gold , with a sweet honey.  He bought a bunch from me.  I did not know him at the time.  So he signed.  It said, "Jimmy Dean."  I exclaimed, " That is a famous name."  He said, "Yep, had it all my life."  True story.

OK, I GOT THERE, WHAT HAPPENED?

Thought you would never ask.

Artigras setup is very mellow.  You set up on Friday.  Show runs Sat. thru Mon.

You can usually park right in front of your booth.  If you are smart, you choose the side that has a lot of room behind your booth for storage.

You may ask,"Which side is that?"

Well, it depends where you are in the show.

Maybe when Barry Bernstein blogs about the Grove, or Geoff talks about Sarasota, then maybe I will give you more info.  All I am saying, there is room for storage behind almost every booth.

If you set up close to your property line on one side and get a cooperative neighbor, you can have an aisle on the other side and hang 2-D work that people can actually see.

I got a sub at Publix in Lake Wales and had a mellow lunch midway thru my setup.  I was done by 4 pm and called Vaughn.

"Vaughn" being my room-mate for the weekend--Steve Vaughn-- a very successful, notorious and giving photographer.  For such a great artist that he is, he is  very humble, open and more importantly, great to be with.

Vaughn does mostly HA shows these days and kills them where-ever he goes.

I spotted him as a up-and-comer at the Cedar Key show in the early 1990's.  He was a unique image-maker from the get-go.

Anyways, Steve and I are old friends, rivals, golf-buddies and confidants.

We have roomed together at many shows over the years.  We are a pair.

We stay at the La Quinta in Jupiter.  Right on the warer.  You can walk to three great restaurants.

Anyways, back to the show.

Vaughn is an image-driven photographer, and I mean that as a compliment.

So after setup on Friday and meeting at the hotel, he says, "Let's go out shooting."  I know he didn't mean "Wild Turkey."  He is not much of a drinker.

So  we meandered down to Jupiter inlet, at the bridge, did some shots--just before sunset.

Then we meandered to the "Square Grouper Restaurant" and did more shooting across at the lighthouse.

Then, it was on to the Juno Beach pier.  Steve does a lot of HA shows here and has a ready audience for his images--me, I was along for the ride.

We lucked out.

Neither of us knew that Friday was the night of the full moon.

There it was, rising out of a cloudy horizon like a fiery phoenix.

We both got great shots.  How great ,to be determined at future dates.

Well, being Valentine's day meant getting into any restaurant that nite was going to be a big chore.  Hours of waiting.  Love was in the air--everywhere.

We finally snuck into a cool Italian bistro and secured two seats.  We ate good pizza and went home to watch the Winter Olympics.

OK.OK.  FINALLY, TELL US ABOUT THE DAMN SHOW!

Thought you would never ask.

Saturday started off very slow, and got slower and slower as the day went on.

It was my poorest Saturday, ever, at Artigras.

Some people made good money--but they were in a distinct minority.  Two, well-known photographers (who don't want to be known in this blog) did not even top $100 on Saturday.

They were not alone.  It sucked all around.

OK, the Sterns killed them--great--they needed it, and God intervened--and they got it.  Enough said.

Ironically, this was the greatest weather we have ever had for this show.  Not one hint of humidity in three days, jeez, we had vests on in the morns, and back on by 4 pm.

Maybe too nice.  Maybe people were golfing, boating and fishing.  They definitely were not buying much art.

As always, there are great exceptions, but they were few.

By show show close, I had done about 50 percent of what I usually do--I was an unhappy camper--but a happy camper, too, because me and Vaughn were going to the Reef for dinner.  Whole Bahamian Yellowtail Snapper coming my way soon.

The Reef, also known as "Charlies" is legendary in this neck of the woods.

Fresh  seafood, done just right, and at the right price, and lots of choices.  Grouper, snapper, cobia, wahoo, you name it--they got it.

Always a long wait.  Put your name on the list and wait--maybe a half hour--then yum!  "We be eating good!"

Back to the hotel--more Olympics, we licked our wounds and hoped for a better day tomorrow.

TOMORROW--ALSO KNOWN AS SUNDAY

Sunday came and gone, and we were not better off then Saturday.  I never made a first sale til 12:30 pm, I got to read the entire NY Times and do the crossword before my first sale, that really sucks.

Again, crowds were milling along, but not really looking.

Also, I got very few, if any, be-backs.  You had one brief shot at them, and then Aloha, they were off to other climes.

Oh, I did not win best in show--I guess I will hold off on that new van purchase.

One cool thing about the show was my neighbor--Tom LeGault.  A famed painter from Michigan.

I have seen him for centuries at Ann Arbor.

He is a painting derverish.  He can finish a 24"x24' ORIGINAL in 30 minutes.  They were buying them as fast as he could finish them.

He had a killer show.  I wish I had half as a good show as him.  Perish the thought.

The crowds bought art, mostly at low-end prices.  I saw my share of photo-canvasses go by.  Saw lots of lowend Giclees.  But, they were few and far in between.  It was not what I called a good show with an audience looking for exciting art.  If anything, they were looking for cheap Kettle Corn and $7 beer.

Vaughn went out with buddies and I went back to the Reef--more snapper, please.

THE FINALE--MONDAY

Mondays at both the Grove and Artigras are very anti-climatic.  I don't know why we have to put up with them.

The best thing you can say about the Monday is--"Well, this ain't a Tuesday show, so you better kill them today."

Usually, if I make more than $300 on Monday, I am doing somersaults.

They should let us tear down at 4 pm so we can be home before dark.  But no, they are cruel bastards.  5pm then wait til the crowd thins, and maybe in by 5:30 and out by 7pm.  

Now, you either suck it up for another nite in a hotel, or drive home in the dark, exhausted and not really fully alert to all the dangers on the road.

Luckily, I have a good ex-show photo-buddy who got out of the biz before the great crash in 2008.  He lives near Jensen Beach, about 45 minutes from the show.  I was there by 7:30 and eating supper with him at Conchy Joes, a legendary eatery right on the water.

I limped home Tuesday morn, kissed my beautiful bride and quickly tried to make up lost time for missing her on Valentine's day plus her birthday two days later.

The Blonde deserves good presents.  She got them.

FINAL THOUGHTS

The way I write my blogs is a dream.  I realize that.

 I wish everybody else could describe their on-the-road experiences like I do.  But that is not going to happen.

I glory in my life, been doing it 39 years, and, I am glad to share it with others.

Hope you enjoyed the ride, Nels.